It was the most anticipated day in recent times. For almost a year I worked without giving much attention to how much I take home. What I took home was enough to buy me food, pay my bills, buy me another pair of jeans, occasionally spoil myself at some good restaurant or go bowling with friends. But things were about to change. My paycheck was about to put on a little weight. And with the anticipation, anxiety and nervousness were on the rise.
To make things better, I had a windfall. I certainly did not see a promotion coming my way. I mean, I badly wanted it. But with all the diplomatic talk I had with my seniors, likeliness of a change in my job title was slim. I wasn't thinking much about it but a fatter paycheck was certainly on my mind. I said to myself, if I reach a certain figure, I might consider buying a car. The prospect of owning my very first car made me feel great. It was an elated feeling and I couldn't wait for the dream to come true.
And so the moment drew on. Soon the word went around that new pay scales were out and employees could check their online accounts. With great expectations, I logged on. Only to frown and log off immediately. Seems the new car would still be a distant dream. I fared low on my own expectations. Being appraised at an average scale did not amuse me. I had put in more efforts than the year before. I was certainly discontent. A few quick calculations of how much more could I be taking home did nothing to cheer me. Gloom was the color of the day. I did not feel like working for rest of the day. That's what happens when expectations are not met.
I left office in the same mood. Man it sucked! Sucked to know that things were just average at work. Sucked that all the hard work and promotion did not bear much monetary fruit. I needed something to cheer me. And I knew just the thing to do.
As I steered my way through the city traffic, riding my bike, I took a long detour on my way home. I rode through the outer perimeter of the city, watching the sun go down and disappear. Watched the green pastures of land with patches of concrete houses cropping in between. Rode by a serene lake. Someone was there still hoping to catch fish along the banks. The entire trip back home was soothing and truly therapeutic in a way. Just an hour ago, I was discontent, displeased and disappointed deep down. And here I was, experiences something totally different. The sinking feeling I had all afternoon had ebbed away.
By the time I reached home, I was in a jolly good mood. I had my favorite food for dinner and then celebrated my pay rise and promotion with some hot chocolate and ice cream. Cherry on top. The momentary agony of not meeting my own expectations had eluded me now.
The next day, I smiled and started for work. A new day with new possibilities, new challenges and of course a new dream. A bigger better car. Maybe next year.
Apr 30, 2008
Mar 15, 2008
Skeptical about love
The other day I was having a casual lunch with my colleague, chatting about the usual work and the fast approaching weekend. Our voices were muffled by the cacophony in the cafeteria. At lunch time the silence of the place gives in and at times you have to make an effort to get your voice across the table. Our discussion soon turned to how our mutual friend had recently confirmed his relationship status as committed. He had found love in a girl from our office and was very excited about this new turn in his life. The talk continued for some time.
Then suddenly I was thrown a question by my lunch companion. She asked me why didn't I ever share such things with them. She was damn sure that there must be someone that I like, but somehow I never tell such stuff to anybody. And she seemed very curious to know how in the world could I not find someone interesting enough.
I was taken a little aback and wondered, lady why do you even want to get me started on that. Not that you don’t know the story. You guys tricked me into spilling out the beans and I went on to narrate my share of story in every possible detail. But that was like three years ago and I guess I have moved on.
My reply was more patient than impulsive. I agreed that overcoming my past relationship wasn't the easiest thing to do. Being too deeply involved, the emotional bruises have just started to show signs of healing completely. That obviously does not make me invulnerable. Also it makes little sense to jump at the next chance that life has to throw at me.
Probably falling in love was the best lessons life has ever taught me. Things may not have gone through the way I expected them to, but I definitely know how it feels to be in love. Honestly, I haven't felt better in recent times. All the gorgeous faces that I see around would certainly make me take that plunge again, but at some level it just doesn't click.
Love is something that I may not understand completely. There was a time when I was a non-believer thinking that something like love does not exist. Then unwillingly, unknowingly I fell in love. I was all game to make impulsive decisions, make a complete fool of myself, risk being called crazy, do anything that could win me her heart. Now the spontaneity and the excitement eludes me, taking me back to the place where I wish love never exist to cause me the pain. Some may call me rigid, some cold hearted. But I am skeptical. If dreams can be shattered once, so can they be crushed second time around. And though the first debacle earned me some nuggets of wisdom, I am certainly not a master at matters of heart.
Free advice from other self-proclaimed love gurus is going to take me nowhere. I'd rather be on my own. If it is this skepticism that is making me rigid, devoid of emotions then maybe the antidote is a sweet potion of love, given just as unexpectedly as before.
Then suddenly I was thrown a question by my lunch companion. She asked me why didn't I ever share such things with them. She was damn sure that there must be someone that I like, but somehow I never tell such stuff to anybody. And she seemed very curious to know how in the world could I not find someone interesting enough.
I was taken a little aback and wondered, lady why do you even want to get me started on that. Not that you don’t know the story. You guys tricked me into spilling out the beans and I went on to narrate my share of story in every possible detail. But that was like three years ago and I guess I have moved on.
My reply was more patient than impulsive. I agreed that overcoming my past relationship wasn't the easiest thing to do. Being too deeply involved, the emotional bruises have just started to show signs of healing completely. That obviously does not make me invulnerable. Also it makes little sense to jump at the next chance that life has to throw at me.
Probably falling in love was the best lessons life has ever taught me. Things may not have gone through the way I expected them to, but I definitely know how it feels to be in love. Honestly, I haven't felt better in recent times. All the gorgeous faces that I see around would certainly make me take that plunge again, but at some level it just doesn't click.
Love is something that I may not understand completely. There was a time when I was a non-believer thinking that something like love does not exist. Then unwillingly, unknowingly I fell in love. I was all game to make impulsive decisions, make a complete fool of myself, risk being called crazy, do anything that could win me her heart. Now the spontaneity and the excitement eludes me, taking me back to the place where I wish love never exist to cause me the pain. Some may call me rigid, some cold hearted. But I am skeptical. If dreams can be shattered once, so can they be crushed second time around. And though the first debacle earned me some nuggets of wisdom, I am certainly not a master at matters of heart.
Free advice from other self-proclaimed love gurus is going to take me nowhere. I'd rather be on my own. If it is this skepticism that is making me rigid, devoid of emotions then maybe the antidote is a sweet potion of love, given just as unexpectedly as before.
Mar 2, 2008
Make a Sacrifice
Recently I saw this commercial on television, which shows a school kid walking over a bridge on a small lake and is suddenly prompted to make a plunge in the water. Wouldn't that be great fun!? But he is compelled not to, by his parents. The boy grows up, is married and has an executive job. But somewhere down the line, he wants to quit and do what he feels is right. But then he thinks about his wife and the child they were expecting soon. Despite his urge to quit, he holds on to the job. He soon prospers and now wants to buy an expensive new car. But then he sees his children and their education needs, which he must meet. Off goes the desire to buy a swanky new vehicle. He had been making a sacrifice at every stage of his life. A compromise with his desires, for different compelling reasons. Years later when he is retired, he makes a walk to the same bridge. He remembers his childhood wish and decides for once to follow his heart. He takes that plunge and realizes his wish. He couldn't have been more happier than on that day.
This ad made me thinking. I agree that one should follow his heart and do what makes you happy, but I can’t help notice the sacrifices that man made at every stage of his life.
Sacrifice may not always be a compulsion. Today, someone living a single life with least worries at hand does not have to sacrifice his desires. For him life has no compromises and he wants to make things go his way. But life brings with it new responsibilities at every passing stage. Soon he would have a wife to care for and kids to look after. He would then have to strive to provide them with best of everything. The struggle to make them happy, lands him in situations where a compromise at some level becomes a must. He may have to forfeit a personal desire for sake of his family. Rewards reaped by such sacrifice maybe be far more than pursuing his personal wantings. Of course no compromise should be too large. One doesn't want a regrettable life!
If essential sacrifice is so important to an individual, then he must surely realize that same sacrifices have been made by his parents for his upbringing. If you never had hardships growing up, got what you always wanted, have good education and lead a successful life, chances are that a great deal of sacrifice has gone into that making. It is time to repay in kind. Be a part of your parents' lives just as you have been all your life. Make some sacrifices of your own to make sure they are loved. Care for them. They don't need your cash. But your love is something they cannot buy. They might not expect much in return, but that does not free you of the debt you owe them.
Life will come full circle when sacrifices you make reap a garden with caring gardeners, who will nurture both old and new plants with unending love.
Don't be selfish. Make a sacrifice. It’s essential.
This ad made me thinking. I agree that one should follow his heart and do what makes you happy, but I can’t help notice the sacrifices that man made at every stage of his life.
Sacrifice may not always be a compulsion. Today, someone living a single life with least worries at hand does not have to sacrifice his desires. For him life has no compromises and he wants to make things go his way. But life brings with it new responsibilities at every passing stage. Soon he would have a wife to care for and kids to look after. He would then have to strive to provide them with best of everything. The struggle to make them happy, lands him in situations where a compromise at some level becomes a must. He may have to forfeit a personal desire for sake of his family. Rewards reaped by such sacrifice maybe be far more than pursuing his personal wantings. Of course no compromise should be too large. One doesn't want a regrettable life!
If essential sacrifice is so important to an individual, then he must surely realize that same sacrifices have been made by his parents for his upbringing. If you never had hardships growing up, got what you always wanted, have good education and lead a successful life, chances are that a great deal of sacrifice has gone into that making. It is time to repay in kind. Be a part of your parents' lives just as you have been all your life. Make some sacrifices of your own to make sure they are loved. Care for them. They don't need your cash. But your love is something they cannot buy. They might not expect much in return, but that does not free you of the debt you owe them.
Life will come full circle when sacrifices you make reap a garden with caring gardeners, who will nurture both old and new plants with unending love.
Don't be selfish. Make a sacrifice. It’s essential.
Dec 31, 2007
A Monologue
Its been quite some time since I have had anything new to put on this blog. Seems the Storyteller is running out of stories. That's not the way it is. At some level, these stories have been a part of me. Some incident that happened to me, or someone I know or just some curious observation, that set the pen rolling on the paper.
Writing does come as a passion to me and as some creative work takes form, I often wonder whether it is just me who likes what is written. I ask my friends to be open critics and their honest suggestions do help to improve. This also lets me know that I am being appreciated. Its nice to have a small fan following.
Some words of criticism that I have received so far are that the stories get too profound, too philosophical and at times too personal. Can't blame anyone for that. Having lived a story, I find it easier to narrate the incidence more sincerely and incidents that inspire are told with even more intensity. A friend told me that my attempt at a light funny story lacked the punch and humour. Well that's a positive feedback in a way since now there is more room for improvement.
I don't want this to be just another blog. The Storyteller wants to tell stories with words that reach out and touch the reader. Anything that inspires a story worth telling and stirs the writer in me, shall and will make it to this blog. If blogging were an art and I were an artist, then let this canvas be painted with most beautiful, colorful, funny, intense, inspiring and maybe thought provoking stories.
The Storyteller will take a leave now, got some stories to pen down.
Writing does come as a passion to me and as some creative work takes form, I often wonder whether it is just me who likes what is written. I ask my friends to be open critics and their honest suggestions do help to improve. This also lets me know that I am being appreciated. Its nice to have a small fan following.
Some words of criticism that I have received so far are that the stories get too profound, too philosophical and at times too personal. Can't blame anyone for that. Having lived a story, I find it easier to narrate the incidence more sincerely and incidents that inspire are told with even more intensity. A friend told me that my attempt at a light funny story lacked the punch and humour. Well that's a positive feedback in a way since now there is more room for improvement.
I don't want this to be just another blog. The Storyteller wants to tell stories with words that reach out and touch the reader. Anything that inspires a story worth telling and stirs the writer in me, shall and will make it to this blog. If blogging were an art and I were an artist, then let this canvas be painted with most beautiful, colorful, funny, intense, inspiring and maybe thought provoking stories.
The Storyteller will take a leave now, got some stories to pen down.
Oct 6, 2007
Happy Anniversary
To Mom and Dad...
"This day marks an important milestones in the lives of my parents. The gamut of expressions that I am seeing on their face is a rich mixture of happiness, tears of joy and a little bit of bewilderment.
They have been there for each other, standing besides one another for 25 years and I have been a part of this journey for 22 years. This span has given me a chance to have a deep insight into their lives.
Though it is difficult to recollect much when I was a tiny toddler, but I knew I would always be safe with the constant love and care that they had for me. Life was very easy then.But infants grow into kids and kids behave like brats at times. That was enough to invite all the trouble I could handle.
Almost everyone present here is well conversant with my dad's temper. I guess you could empathize with me, especially when I was only 10 years old then.
But where there is anger, there is love and the hand caresses longer after it has slapped a cheek or two.
At every walk of my life I have needed and always been blessed by their support and affection. Be it the yesteryears when I was in school or the more recent years of graduation. Their selfless devotion towards my well being is something which I would never forget in my lifetime.
For all these years I not only witnessed their love for their kids but all the sweet and bitter moments among themselves. The marital tussles and some pretty worse arguments, at times, always ended very well, which have strengthened their relationship and love for each other and I today I know they are the happiest couple around.
For all this and more, I sometimes look up to HIM. HE just looks down and smiles for a job well done. I smile back too, because I know I have the best parents in the world.
Happy 25th Anniversary"
This is a small speech that I read out at the function we had, on occasion of my parents' 25th wedding anniversary in 2004. My cousins had planned the function really well and I was asked to participate in any possible way. Singing some song or performing anything else was out of question. I know I am not good at that. So a small speech made a perfect anniversary present. But I was so busy with chores of the day, that I kept postponing the time when I would sit down and start writing one. This speech was not ready until just 45 minutes before our function. Impromptu, huh!
"This day marks an important milestones in the lives of my parents. The gamut of expressions that I am seeing on their face is a rich mixture of happiness, tears of joy and a little bit of bewilderment.
They have been there for each other, standing besides one another for 25 years and I have been a part of this journey for 22 years. This span has given me a chance to have a deep insight into their lives.
Though it is difficult to recollect much when I was a tiny toddler, but I knew I would always be safe with the constant love and care that they had for me. Life was very easy then.But infants grow into kids and kids behave like brats at times. That was enough to invite all the trouble I could handle.
Almost everyone present here is well conversant with my dad's temper. I guess you could empathize with me, especially when I was only 10 years old then.
But where there is anger, there is love and the hand caresses longer after it has slapped a cheek or two.
At every walk of my life I have needed and always been blessed by their support and affection. Be it the yesteryears when I was in school or the more recent years of graduation. Their selfless devotion towards my well being is something which I would never forget in my lifetime.
For all these years I not only witnessed their love for their kids but all the sweet and bitter moments among themselves. The marital tussles and some pretty worse arguments, at times, always ended very well, which have strengthened their relationship and love for each other and I today I know they are the happiest couple around.
For all this and more, I sometimes look up to HIM. HE just looks down and smiles for a job well done. I smile back too, because I know I have the best parents in the world.
Happy 25th Anniversary"
This is a small speech that I read out at the function we had, on occasion of my parents' 25th wedding anniversary in 2004. My cousins had planned the function really well and I was asked to participate in any possible way. Singing some song or performing anything else was out of question. I know I am not good at that. So a small speech made a perfect anniversary present. But I was so busy with chores of the day, that I kept postponing the time when I would sit down and start writing one. This speech was not ready until just 45 minutes before our function. Impromptu, huh!
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